10 Signs You Went To An All-Girls Convent School in Singapore

Convent Girl Traits

We may share the hatred for knee-length skirts and the love for communal in-school Valentine’s Day celebrations—including gifts from secret admirers, like the bung from the next class. But even years down the road, there’s just something so significant about ex-convent girls that you can sniff a mile away. When we tell others we came from an all-girls school, “Chey, can tell” is their most common response.

Even though we may sit with one leg up at home and spell great ¾ of the time, here are some traits that potentially define the typical catholic-school-bound chick.

1. No subject is awkward to us

From period talk to our early acceptance of homosexuality through the exposure of lesbian tendencies (yes I said it, call the nuns out on me), we’re as open-minded as can be.

It’s only natural for girls to congregate and talk about their ~ feelings ~. So instead of looking at us like we’re gossip queens, see us as your greatest listeners. And after hearing all the backstabbing crap pubescent girls put each other through, nothing really shocks us anymore.

Born into a culture of debate and discussion, there’s no such thing as oversharing. Because we love to talk—maybe even too much.

2. The jiak kan tang ones suck at Mandarin so bad

Aside from the well-rounded overachievers who can converse with the lao shis of course.

Maybe it’s the unhealthy addiction to witty yet derogatory banter to one another in our native language (English), but our Mother Tongue is more like a distant aunt who criticises our single status during Chinese New Year.

The only Higher Mother Tongue we know is Sarcasm, which we speak fluently. However, come later in life, we wish it wasn’t so hard to order a damn bowl of bak chor mee due to our fear-complex. When high-pitched screeches resemble our Mandarin teachers exclaiming our Chinese names, we still get jumpy.

3. We are THE masters of passive aggression

Being surrounded by the master source of passive aggression really sharpened our shade-throwing skills. Especially since girl-on-girl disputes are frequent occurrences that need to be handled covertly. But contrary to Mean Girl’s beliefs, not everything in girl-world has to be sneaky. We can sure as hell make you feel our wrath with the iciest cold shoulder, backhanded remark, and piercing death-stare. RBFs, salute!

4. We’re buay paiseh

It must be linked to the fact that we spent our most vital teenage years in an open and supportive environment that allowed us to flourish. We didn’t have boys around, so we had the space to develop our identity without being apologetic about it. No judgement, no social construct to dictate the idea of ‘ladylike’.

But it’s not like we’ve never socialised with boys outside the compounds. Just because something isn’t easily accessible, doesn’t mean we won’t find a way. It was just easier for KC girls to hunt males down when they were only one love-bridge away from St Pat’s.

5. We have diva-reflex

Somehow, almost every convent girl you meet will have a melodramatic tendency. Maybe it’s the fact that our cohabitants for up to 10 years included many people from Drama class—which was considered pretty cool in the all-female environment. Or the fact that we thrived amidst the battlefield of girlish catfights, which honed our exaggeration skills.

Even if you weren’t heavily involved in the school’s politics, witnessing  drama alone probably rubbed off on you. You’d know how to flex that drama-queen muscle if provoked. I believe in you.

6. We’re super affectionate

Boob slaps. Hugs upon every interaction. Nothing is misconstrued as flirty among us the way it would be if we were to act the same way around guys. We’re comfortable being excessively touchy with our girlfriends because that’s just how much we love them. So boys, sorry for the misunderstanding.

7. We’re extremely empathetic

I’m pretty sure we all knew of cry-babies in our schools. But in an all girls’ institution, it’s just more common. So we’ve learnt how to handle the superfluous emotion that runs deep within our womanly loins, expertly and efficiently.

Girls cry for an array of reasons, and yes we’ll be the first to admit—that includes shark week. We’re used to young girls overreacting to trivial problems. We don’t judge. We are just sympathetic, sensitive little angels who know where you’re coming from.

8. Although, people might think we’re “exclusive”

Our low-key diva attitude also ensues we might end up a little lost when mixing among people of diverse backgrounds. Not to be confused with acting elitist; we’re just used to being candid without backlash or people easily taking offense. So that may cause some misunderstandings on our (perceived) “don’t talk to me” disposition.

Outside, we might be susceptible to post-convent culture shock, but among our kind the camaraderie is strong. Some label this as clique-y, but it’s just the ease of comfort with those who can tolerate our meanest, rudest, unglam sides.

9. We go 0 to 100 (and back) real quick

We either love with all our heart, or hate with every fibre in our body. We tend to be fiercely loyal, or your presence can be considered non-existent as far as we’re concerned.

We’ve hated girls of opposing convent schools for no apparent reason, then became best friends with them some time later. Guess we all shared the same struggle of feigning skirt length when bending down every time the teachers checked if our knees were covered by the pinafore. Or the pain of getting nagged at for sitting with our legs apart. Even though that was the game plan because we had shorts underneath, obviously.

10. The bonds we forged in our convent years are lifelong

Friends come and go, but there’ll be at least 1 to 2 (or 10) girlfriends who will stick by us through thick and thin even past our convent years.

We’ve pulled one another out of every bathroom episode, PMS-induced rage and every great escape to pon morning assembly. So when that Kanye West song plays, you best believe we’re thinking about them. Because AIN’T NOBODY FRESHER THAN MY M*F*ING CLIQUE.

Convent Girl Antics

I like to think our species is all business in the front, party at the back. We’re just used to having righteous authoritative figures breathe down our necks with their strict rules, dress codes and culture. But that struck a good balance in us and now in hindsight, that’s what bred a bunch of fun-loving, yet proper young ladies. When the time calls for it, at least. -Source

Life Growing Up As An Indian Muslim Girl in Singapore

Indian Muslims in Singapore

When I was younger, I had the makings of a diva—I thought I was hella cute, charming and had the confidence of a rock star. In fact, my signature move to aptly display my disinterest was to dramatically flip my hair/veil over my shoulder before making my exit.

However, this self-esteem gave way the moment I entered primary school. At the impressionable age of seven, I was taught that as an Indian, my hairy arms made me less appealing than my Chinese or even Malay counterparts.

One incident that stuck with me was when two of my group mates loudly whispered to themselves about how “ugly” I was. Although it seemed like an insignificant event, that comment embedded the seed of insecurity and inferiority in me.

Fast forward to my teenage years, I started to obsess over my atypical looks, only to be reminded of how different I was through mainstream media. Beauty advertisements babbled on about whitening creams while and local TV shows mainly featured Chinese actresses. I felt displaced and under-represented.

If the epitome of ‘Asian beauty’ somehow became synonymous with ‘oriental beauty’ at large, where did that leave the rest of us?

Racial slurs/stereotypes 

Being told that you’re ‘black’ every so often is not much fun, even if it’s just a joke—especially if it’s a joke. More importantly, unless you’re colour blind, you should know that I’m brown. What I’m bothered about is the use of ‘black’ as a derogatory term. I don’t get why every slightly tanned Chinese person is nicknamed ‘Indian’ and ‘Black’.

Once, I told my Chinese friends that I’ll only let them call me ‘Black’ if I could call them ‘Yellow’. The fairest of them all vehemently rejected my proposition, saying, “NooOooO I’m not yellow, I’m fair,” to which I replied, “Okay then, we’ll settle for a compromise; you’re pale yellow.” That shut her up all right.

I do admit that stereotypes stem from certain truths but it isn’t nice for people to use it as an insult or to generalise an entire race by it.

More than just a beauty competition

But when I grew older, the illusion that Singapore is a truly racially harmonious country gave way when I realised that racism exists beyond skin deep.

There’s racism present in our housing market where landlords explicitly state their preference for, “No Indians, No PRCs.” There’s even racism in some of our third generation Singaporeans being denied their nationality just because they come from a minority racial group.

Job prospects

Once, I submitted a passport-sized photo of myself after being selected for a job but the employer completely ghosted me after receiving the picture.

I understand that certain jobs require the employees to speak Mandarin. But when the employers confirm me for an English-speaking role, only to ghost on me after they see a picture of me with a piece of fabric over my head? Tell me it was my “skill set” that didn’t make the cut.

The worst part is when the majority won’t even acknowledge the underlying prejudice as they’ve probably never been discriminated against before.

The need to classify/compartmentalise

Despite the number of times I explain that I’m both an Indian and a Muslim, most people seem uncomfortable when they’re unable to ‘classify’ my ethnicity. In fact, many of them don’t even know that being Malay =/= being a Muslim.

As a Hijabi, I’ve been mistaken to be Malay to even Punjabi (what even?!) and although such an issue may seem like a micro-aggression, let us be reminded that it’s 2017 and such issues shouldn’t exist.

So let me explain the difference: Ethnicity is inherited from one’s ancestors and encompasses the cultural aspect of one’s life. Religion, on the other hand, is a belief in God/Gods and is something one chooses to subscribe to.

With that definition, it’s possible for someone to be a person of Indian ancestry and subscribe to Islamic principles. I’ve met Christian Malays, Hindu Chinese, and atheist Indians so it’s not all that hard to figure out if you understand the intricacies with regards to race and religion.

More importantly, it’s okay if someone comes from an ambiguous background. We don’t always have to staunchly hold on to our cultural identities and deny the authenticity of another person’s identity just because we don’t understand it.

Mixed race relationships

When it comes to B/G relationships, if a girl of a minority race gets together with someone of a majority race, sometimes it’s negatively viewed as her “climbing up the social ladder”. This brings about prejudice-fuelled exclamations of, “OMG your boyfriend is Chinese?!”, as though it’s supposed to be an #achievementunlocked.

And it works both ways. Some of my family members who married outside our racial group were labelled  ‘betrayers’ for abandoning their own kind.

Every time I attend an interracial wedding, my mother makes me promise that I’d never do such a thing. Although I respect my mother’s wishes, I believe that love is blind to discrimination and we shouldn’t impose unnecessary judgement on others.

Unacknowledged majority privilege

My favourite quote of late has been,“Privilege is invisible to those who have it.”

Source

I’m not saying that we should abolish “majority privilege”, but we should make an effort to empathise with people who are in a less advantaged state than us.

My journey to take charge of my self-esteem was a difficult one but I learnt that I don’t need external validation to feel confident or beautiful. I based my self-confidence on what my inherent strengths and weaknesses were, and not by looks.

Nonetheless, I’m thankful for how progressive feminists are in Singapore. In order for our society to cohesively progress, certain societal ills must be acknowledged through open discussion.

Be a #Woke Singaporean

Singaporeans have racial harmony ingrained in our DNA since young. Although we’re taught to get along and to ignore the undercurrent tensions, recent incidents have made me a more #woke member of society.

Sweeping such issues under the rug won’t help for long ‘cause over time, maintaining the status quo will only lead to minority people’s dissent. Instead, we should all be more #woke Singaporeans. -Source

15 Types Of Girls’ School Girls You’ll Find In Singapore

Girls’ School Girls

Some may think being in an all-girls school is much like being in Mean Girls: catfights, toilet gossip sessions, and segregated cliques within an established pecking order.

But really, after being in an all-girls school for ten years, I can tell you it isn’t all drama and sass. Sure, I’ve experienced my fair share of disputes, but ultimately, these little differences added colour to my life.

If you’ve attended an all-girls school, or are still studying in one, you probably know some of these girls and count them as part of your close-knit family of friends.

1. The one who changes in class all the time

“Don’t turn around ah, I’m changing!”

These girls have mastered the art of slipping out of their pinafores within seconds. Skilful and discreet, they’ve never accidentally flashed a teacher.

Occasionally, you’ll catch her changing outfits five minutes before the lesson ends, so she can scoot off to her CCA immediately after the bell rings.

2. The one who shouts for pads across the classroom

While there’s absolutely nothing to be shy about in an all-girls school, this girl cranks it up a notch.

You’ll definitely know when she’s on her period because you’ll hear a loud “Oi, does anyone have a pad?!” from across the classroom.

It’s no biggie—shout and you shall receive.

3. The one who looks like a butch

Often in more sporty CCAs such as netball, this girl has long swapped her dresses and denim shorts for shirts and berms.

At one point, she’s probably gotten a haircut at the S$5 barber shop the boys frequent.

4. The one who goes around smacking asses and unhooking bras

Quietly descending upon her unsuspecting victim, she catches them off guard and runs off screaming and cackling after having completed a ‘successful mission’.

Years after graduation, you still don’t understand why she derives satisfaction from such antics.

5. The one who breaks the rules

Girls’ school girls are often repeatedly told to be ‘young ladies’ who have to ‘uphold the school’s reputation’ (whatever that means).

But there’s this girl who just DGAF. She hangs out with ‘bad’ company, has a boyfriend in lower sec, skips class, and *gasps* smokes in the school toilet. Sometimes, she even wears her school uniform while playing truant.

When hauled into the principal’s office and berated by teachers who think she’s going against God’s ways, she’ll always reply:

Source

6. The one who is boy crazy

Whenever there is a male guest speaker or exchange student in school, she’ll be the first to rush back to class, gushing “OMG! OMG!!! HE’S DAAAAMN CUTE!!!”

Sometimes, you’ll even catch her ogling the hot male teacher who teaches Biology.

Source

7. The one who wears makeup to school

She’s the girl who comes to school with her brows on fleek and skin looking #flawless. When asked if she wears makeup, she becomes defensive and insists she #wokeuplikethis.

Usually, she’s also the girl who dyes her hair brown and tells everyone it’s her natural colour. If she swims, she probably blames the chlorine for lightening her hair.

But really gurlll, why are your roots still black?

8. The one who knows every guy from the boys’ school down the road

Some call her popular, while others call her ‘slutty’. After school, she often hangs out with a group of boys at the nearby McDonalds or mall rooftop.

Ask about any guy and she’ll be able to give you a little beef on him. If you’re nice, she might even ‘intro’ you to him.

9. The one who glo’d up

Remember the kid who got bullied for being plus-sized in lower sec?

Yeah, she lost all her baby fat before you could say “puberty”, and blossomed into the It girl every boys’ school boy had a crush on.

10. The one who is a ‘feminist’

Feminism and standing for equality is great, but not when you misconstrue it and turn into a full-blown feminazi.

During class discussions and relationship talks, the feminazi usually argues along the vein of, “yeah, because all boys are MCPs (male chauvinist pigs)”. All in the name of ‘feminism’, of course.

Not the actual definition of feminism.
Source

11. The one who has Princess Syndrome

Known as ‘Daddy’s Spoilt Little Girl’, she’s the princess who always boasts about her latest phone model, pop albums, and shopping haul.

Even if she lives just down the road, her parents will still chauffeur her to school in a fancy car. And if they don’t, she’ll whine and insist until they do.

12. The one who speaks with an angmoh accent

Despite being 100% local, this girl probably feels speaking in a fake American accent automatically makes her cooler and better than the rest.

Peppering her speech with slang, and adding “like” and “oh my God” in the way only Cali girls do, she makes sure to harp on how she ‘picked up her accent on her family trip to America’ from years ago.

13. The one whose entire family is part of the alumni

Patriotic by blood, this girl’s mum, sisters, and aunts are probably old girls. As members of the alumni committee, you’ll hear their surname mentioned at every charity donation board, parent-teacher meeting, and extracurricular activity.

In 15 years, you’ll likely find her daughters there too.

14. The one who is everyone’s girl crush

Super smart, super athletic, super talented, super chio—she’s the girl everyone wants to be.

#spoilmarket

15. The one who is the mum of the group

Usually carrying around a water bottle and a pack of tissues, the mum of the group somehow feels responsible for the welfare of everyone around her.

Aside from returning your plates after recess or nagging you to drink more water because “it’s good for you”, her maturity gives her insight so she knows just what to say to resolve petty girl drama.

Source

Being In An All-Girls School

No matter what type of girls’ school girl you are, celebrate your difference because it’s diversity which makes us stronger. -Source

13 Things Which Only Happen In Singapore Girls’ Schools

Image source

Girls’ School Culture

When parents think of all-girls schools in Singapore, most would picture a prestigious distraction-free institution, for their daughters to further their studies and blossom into well-groomed young women.

But when actual alumni think of girls’ school, they remember a pretty different picture.

From ratchet catfights to rumours about haunted toilets, life in an all-girls school is… exciting, to say the least.

Whether you were the guai-est nerd or the biggest slacker, here are some real-life stories you can probably relate to if you went to an all-girls school in Singapore.

*Some names were changed to protect identities

1. Boy drama when girls hooked up with church mates

In my girls’ school, I was happily single but incredibly bored. As there were no boys in school, most girls hooked up with guys from church, an affiliated school, or tuition class. And whenever there was boy drama, the gossip turned into lunch topics we lived for.

When my friend was the first girl in class to get a boyfriend from church, she had the juiciest relationship drama. Her first time story had us all shook because we’d never known anyone else who’d ‘done it’.

Girls would also fight over popz guys from the affiliated boys’ school. While I managed to stay out of it, there were girls who fell out with each other because of these crushes.
Chloe, 20

2. Widespread lesbianism

In Sec 1, a rumour about one girl being gay was the most controversial thing we’d ever heard. When she got a girlfriend, they became the most famous couple in school.

But fast forward to Sec 4, 30% of the school had come out as gay or bi, including myself.

No one treated it like a controversy anymore, and it was comforting to be in a community which didn’t discriminate.
Lea, 18

3. Unique school rules

Most schools have strict rules, but girls’ schools take it to another level. Skirt too short? Buy a new one. Hair too long? Cut it off with the pair of scissors in the staff room.

There were several things we could be reprimanded for: coloured bras, wearing a suit to prom, hugging (the school thought we would turn gay), not having a school logo on our socks, having hair too long or too short, etc.

Once, a girl who participated in Hair For Hope was forced to wear a wig to school.

But by Sec 4, many found ourselves criticising juniors for looking unkempt and ruining our public image.

Source

Sabrina, 19

4. Rabak catfights

I think being in a girls’ school makes you more confident, but not always in a good way. Especially with no guys around to impress, many girls had no qualms about going full-ratchet and picking fights with others.

The first time I witnessed a catfight was when someone talked shit about my classmate’s girlfriend. She got defensive and responded by splashing water on the girl’s face.

From there, there was slapping and hair-pulling, and a huge crowd formed. We only dispersed when some prefects showed up and broke up the fight.
Elena, 24

5. Girls supporting girls

My school had a culture of fiercely cheering friends who were on stage, whether for a performance, an award ceremony, or even morning announcements. It would take forever to get the hall to settle down and carry on with the assembly.

Once, I was about to make an announcement about my CCA’s upcoming event, but my anxiety made my voice shake.

From a corner of the hall where my classmates sat, I heard a collective “Go, Melanie!” It was unnecessarily enthusiastic for a short announcement, but I was extremely grateful.
Melanie, 19

6. Getting caught changing in class

Changing in and out of our PE attire in class was the norm because the bathroom queue was always too long.

Initially, we would face the wall or hide under tables to be discreet. But by Sec 4, most girls would be shamelessly flashing their bras in the middle of the classroom.

Once, a male teacher accidentally walked in while we were getting ready. We made him wait outside and started class 15 minutes late, but he didn’t scold us because the whole ordeal was too embarrassing for him.
Jane, 19

7. No shame or boundaries

Without guys around, we were free from patriarchal expectations of women. Some girls flashed their hairy pits, while others sat with their legs opened because they were “wearing shorts anyway”.

The absence of guys also let us openly discuss topics from periods to masturbation.

My no-filter friend once exclaimed in the middle of class “my vagina damn pain sia!” and excused herself to the sick bay.

Source

Amanda, 19

8. Valentine’s Day was lit

Valentine’s Day was a huge event every year, with girls spending hours handcrafting gifts, writing letters, or buying candies for each other.

One year, there was even an external vendor selling roses during recess due to the demand.

In JC1, not realising the tradition was a girls’ school thing, I made the mistake of getting chocolates for all my classmates. Almost everyone, especially the guys, thought I was weird. Or worse, trying to ‘hit’ on them.
Alicia, 19

9. Fangirling over seniors

It was a big thing, especially in the uniform groups, to idolise your seniors or send anonymous gifts to them.

But by the time we outgrew it, we had our own juniors fangirling about us, and so the cycle continued.
Rachel, 21

10. Being shook when boys show up

While we were independent women who could live without a man, we’d still freak out when groups of guys came for joint-school programmes.

We’d gasp and whisper as we watched them from the opposite end of the canteen as if we had discovered a new species of men. Because back in primary school, these guys were scrawny, prepubescent children.

Visits from these more matured boys were an exciting glimpse into our future of EC-ing guys on a regular basis in JC.
Nadia, 18

11. Excessive skinship

I always felt comfortable hugging and snuggling with my girls’ school friends.

It probably stemmed from all the long, boring assemblies where we’d take naps in the laps of the girl behind us. That, and braiding our friends’ hair, always pissed the speakers off.

My best friend and I enjoyed holding each other’s hands and confusing teachers as to whether we were a couple, knowing it wasn’t within their comfort zone to ask.
Meg, 19

12. Crushing on hot teachers

I’m sure many schoolgirls were infatuated with their hot male teachers, but in girls’ schools, it was intense. The lack of boys to crush on made some teachers the unwilling object of many students’ attention, for four whole years.

There was always some young hottie who’d have his mail tray flooded with gifts and flowers from admirers on Teachers’ Day. Some girls would even sign up for remedial to spend more time with their teacher-crushes.

I cringe when I reflect on my angsty teen days, sighing over unrequited love for a man who was twice my age and married.
Becca, 20

13. Angels & Mortals

Angels and Mortals was a big deal in my school. I’d put so much effort into my letters to my Angel, and kept all her letters to me in a special box.

It felt nice to know there was someone supporting and looking out for me.

But apparently, my school banned the game after I graduated, because it was causing trouble among students. It’s a shame current students will never experience this meaningful tradition.
Gwen, 24

Just Girls’ School Things

The girls’ school experience is something many never forget, long after graduation. Despite some bad memories, many old girls admit those were some of the best years of their lives.

And looking back on the weird shit you and your friends used to do, and still do, it’s clear some things never change.

Report: Singapore has highest gaps in sense of belonging at school between students of different socio-economic statuses

SINGAPORE — A report by the Organisation for Economic Cooperation and Development (OECD) has listed Singapore as having the largest gap in students’ sense of belonging at school, going by their socio-economic status (SES).

Worldwide, this gap between students of higher and lower socio-economic statuses has widened for six countries, namely Singapore, Australia, Brazil, New Zealand, the Slovak Republic and Sweden.

Only four countries — Bulgaria, Japan, the Netherlands and Portugal — have seen their gaps close.

The Equity in Education: Breaking Down Barriers to Social Mobility report, released on Tuesday (Oct 23), takes part of its data from the 2015 results of the OECD's Programme for International Student Assessment (Pisa), which are administered to about 540,000 15-year-olds in 72 countries.

In Singapore in 2015, about 80 per cent of students of higher SES reported that they felt a sense of belonging at school, while about 70 per cent of “disadvantaged students” felt the same way, leading to a gap of about 10 percentage points.

Comparatively, the average across OECD countries was 77 per cent of advantaged students saying that they felt they belong at school, whereas some 69 per cent of disadvantaged students felt the same. The socio-economic gap was thus 8 percentage points.

Back in 2012, when Singapore also took part in Pisa, close to 82 per cent of students of higher SES felt a sense of belonging at school, while about 81 per cent of “disadvantaged students” felt the same way. The gap then was about 1 percentage point.

“Disadvantaged students” are defined as students in the bottom 25 per cent of the socio-economic index in the country, whereas the “advantaged students” are from the top 25 per cent.

Students’ sense of belonging at school is the extent to which they felt accepted by and connected to their peers and part of the school community.

Pisa measured this by asking students to rate — from strongly agree to strongly disagree — whether they felt a sense of belonging at school.

The OECD report noted that, in general, students from “socio-economically advantaged” families enjoy a stronger sense of belonging at school than “disadvantaged students”.

It found that, across the countries surveyed, “interestingly… the socio-economic differences in sense of belonging at school disappear once student performance is taken into account”.

“This suggests that disadvantaged students who score higher enjoy a similarly strong sense of belonging at school as their more advantaged peers,” the report stated.

HARD TO ACCOUNT FOR WIDE GAP

Experts contacted by TODAY said that it was tricky to draw a conclusive explanation for Singapore’s large gap in Pisa 2015, given that it was a single question posed to students.

Associate Professor Jason Tan from the National Institute of Education suggested that one possible factor for the gap is the distribution of students of different SES across schools.

There is evidence to suggest that there is a “disproportionate percentage of high SES students who tend to be enrolled in ‘more prestigious secondary schools’”, and the converse is also true, he said.

He also said that there is insufficient data from the report’s results, given that Pisa did not take into account questions of factors — such as teachers, school leadership, as well as peers — leading to them feeling (or not feeling) a sense of belonging at school.

These questions could be useful to the Ministry of Education (MOE), as well as educators, to better understand the issue, he added.

Dr Timothy Chan, director of SIM Global Education’s academic division, said that to close this “perception gap”, schools need to have a “well representation” of students from across different socio-economic backgrounds.

“If the situation ends up that some schools attract more students with higher SES… then it may lead to (a widening of the gap),” he added.

Assoc Prof Tan said that one long-term effect of such a gap is how parents view their involvement in their school-going children’s education.

Stressing that it was speculative — given the lack of ample evidence — he said that parents who previously had poor experiences in school might view their involvement differently.

“Similarly, someone with a good experience in school… (and a sense of belonging to their school), would want the same for their children,” he added.

Sociologist Tan Ern Ser from the National University of Singapore said that “in the worst-case scenario, the education system would become less of a vehicle for upward mobility, and in turn, lead to greater polarisation in society at large”.

‘ALL SCHOOLS WELL-RESOURCED’: MOE

The OECD report highlighted a trend from earlier reports that students from better socio-economic backgrounds tended to perform better at Pisa.

“Hence, disadvantaged students attending disadvantaged schools are… doubly disadvantaged as they strive for achievement,” the report added.

“Disadvantaged schools” refers to schools in the bottom 25 per cent of the national distribution, based on the average SES levels of students in the schools.

On average, among OECD countries, 48 per cent of disadvantaged students attended disadvantaged schools.

The MOE said that in Singapore, that figure is around 46 per cent.

However, Ms Cindy Khoo, divisional director of MOE’s planning division, said that some clarification was needed on OECD’s use of “doubly disadvantaged” in its report.

“In Singapore’s context, all our schools are well-resourced by international standards. Therefore, our lower-SES students in what OECD termed as ‘disadvantaged schools’ are actually not worse-off in terms of provisions,” she said.

“Nevertheless, MOE has been monitoring the trend independently of OECD and is concerned about the slow creeping up of the proportion,” she added.

The ministry regularly reviews the admissions processes and students’ total educational experience, “to ensure our schools do not become closed circles, and that our students continue to have opportunities to interact with people from diverse backgrounds”, Ms Khoo said. -Source

Unfollowing You On Instagram Doesn’t Mean We Can’t Be Friends

image source

Unfollowing on Instagram

The ‘unfollow’ button is a storm that rocks many Millennials’ friendships. “Unfollowing means they are no longer interested in my life,” they mentioned.

“If we are friends and I unfollow you, it means we are probably not really friends. To be my friend, I would love the person you are, online or offline,” a popular Instagrammer @rchlwngxx explained.

Instagram curates a story of who they wanted to be perceived as; reflecting their ideal selves, hopes, and dreams.

As such it leads many to link unfollowing as a rejection. 

But does ‘unfollow’ = no interest in your life?

Friendships can mean different things

For most people, friendships are formed over tasks at work or school. They were drawn to the same activities like sports or computer games; or find an inexplicable connection on first contact.

When you build a friendship, you don’t always know what pets a person has, what they had for lunch and who their significant other is; common content pillars of people’s Instagram accounts.

While Instagram shows the more worthy aspects of your life, it could be through a period of pain that I bonded with you. And I find it difficult to relate to your filtered smiles or new boyfriend.

It doesn’t mean I have no interest in what you have to say in private (and not on a public platform).

How I feel about social media sometimes. Source

Social media didn’t use to have such high stakes

I remember getting on Instagram almost seven years ago. I posted pretty much whatever I pleased—from neighbourhood cats to the coffee I was drinking.

It was called Instagram because it instantaneously shows where you are and what you are up to.

However, the rules have changed in recent years—vintage filters like X-pro and Sienna phased out with people preferring a more natural “I got up like this” look.

People became savvier about how often they posted, when they posted, and even curated their feed. In a sense, Instagram began to feel more fake or commercial and I no longer felt obligated to follow my friends’ fake lives.

Instagram is more a business than a friendship indicator

It might feel like we have lived on Instagram all this while, but we should be aware the social media landscape constantly shifts and in turn, our relationships and meanings.

Instagram also constantly updates to have a larger stake in our lives. For example, a few people mentioned the new mute function.

“If you find your good friend’s posts annoying, you can just mute it. To unfollow is almost sending a message that I’m not close with you anymore. I don’t wanna see your feed,” Lionel explained.

These new functions pacify the unfollow = unfriend beliefs. However, is it fair to expect our less savvy friends to continually keep up with these unwritten rules?

I, for one, did not know about the mute function before this. Wanting my feed to be filled with more art, comics and memes, I unfollowed some of my friends.

Now, I understand it must have seemed offensive to my friends. Though, I feel friendship should be built on less trivial foundations. 

Does understanding that social media is more of a marketplace than a friendship band help us to take an ‘unfollow’ less seriously?

“I used to have the ‘Unfollow’ app (which helps one detect who unfollowed recently) but deleted it because it was TOXIC,” said Leah, our video producer.

Social media is just one part of our lives

While our emotions tell us that a ‘follow’ or ‘like’ is an official validation of friendship, we need to be wary of such beliefs.

There are many factors that surround friendships and relationships, and social media opens up a whole new chapter with unspoken rules. Some, like me, have outdated guidebooks.

Let’s keep an open mind and not be too quick to jump to the conclusion that an ‘unfollow’ is a deletion of friendship.

The same way we don’t assume a ‘follow’ to be a friend.